| Last night was the Islands show in Newport.
My favorite: Whalebone (The title on the album is "Where There's a Wish, There's a Whalebone"
http://www.myspace.com/islands
I truly enjoyed the show. Concerts are my favorite thing because it is right NOW and you are in it and a part of it and it would be different for someone (even a stranger), or maybe even the band, if you were not there. But I could catch myself wondering when they would be done playing. And then getting caught in my head, and not being there. But I came back, and every time, Islands was waiting for me, and it was grand. Unsettling: my heart doesn't Feel like it used to.
I'd like that back, please.
Perhaps with time.
Today I will paint. The past two mornings, woke to the sound of knocking in my brain. Different patterns and pitches, though.
Two nights ago, a voice saying "Over here," in my right temporal lobe.
To clarify: no external person was the cause.
Startling, scaring.
No, I'm not crazy (but even the crazed don't know they are.)
Do not worry, a week from today, another Therapy appointment with some woman who's never thought on the surreal plane, who approaches psychology objectively, as case studies. This person is this. With a label. I feel she does not understand true fear. Petrifying fear of oneself. I could be wrong. But maybe she can help.
Timid and hesitant because: "I'm hearing things that aren't there."
"Schizophrenic. Meds, crazy house, now."
Could be wrong because: "I'm hearing things that aren't there."
"I wonder what the cause is. Let's dive deeper." I do not trust her to not pass judgement. She does this, she has already. I'm not innocent of the act, either. She has tried to collect thoughts about me from initial impressions, but her initial ideas are slowly becoming unsettled. As I talk, I can watch her become uncomfortable, or not understanding. She is a person who could possibly be easily overwhelmed. That is not what I need. I need someone who can hear a bunch of shit, take it all in, and sort it out. My ideas of her have not changed. In fact, my initial impressions were quite correct. Despite giving her time and opportunity, several of my doubts have been clarified. Lyrics, for the Curious Interestingly enough, I just read all the lyrics to that song for the first time. Somewhere in my subconcious, I must have found the appropriateness, and it was just now brought to my attention. "Where There's a Wish, There's a Whalebone" The morning I set sail on a whalebone
the gale force winds made the sky grow
and I was far out in the ocean
when I cut the roof of my mouth on the potion
down down down went the femur
I let my backbone slide in the ether
laying low in a tropical hideout
if anyone finds out; I'll turn their lights out
subtitle: where there's a will there's a whalebone (way to go) you'll never know
I set sail that morning and I may not come back know lay low
in a hideout just to bust you- tropical
it's neurotic and exotic
with yet another broke down (bone) 'incidental
not accidental
when facts track the mental
even within movement they know, even with the solitary movement
words get arranged for maximum deployment
words mean will
where there's a whalebone then there's a
tale gone wrong
young gang on a boat
it's the same song
same quote
nature stretches it out note by note
It'S a new state, you don't know the nomenclature, the governor has status with
the cutting apparatus
and that is half the battle
they can't think of how to absorb us, they can't thing of how to solve me
let's see
a cancerous mix of young pirates for kicks- signed,
seated C.(L.)(T.)G.
in congealed blood
this is all on the surreal
don't appeal to the side where the law resides
after all that, it's a separatist homicide
rappers try to cultivate carbon monoxide
you tried to get entranced by the folks that try to get us by hap-happenstance.
busdriver: frame our press show with a whale sternum
and a dolphin femur, band breather lab tech with a solvent
in a broken beaker, yell in boom mics and moonlight as a coffin cleaner
then poolside I food fight with Hollywood anorexics
I'm in a crew of pallbearers and ambidextrous foosball players
we got pool hall flair, remove all layers of industry pretension
and augmented physical attributes
because I'm blanketed in nude doll hair
but with these styles we're shrewd on-air
so we've been annexed to an annexed isle
by the radio programmer, half - man reptile
that church of satin bible study tutor choir boy
prefers the works that are uninspired and coy
but uhh Driver's ploy is to show a lot of follow through
wearing a monocle coming out a fiery void
collecting style in rental late fees
they never return it after the test drive
infatuated by a robots breast size
we ain't entertained by balloon animals
marooned on our tropical safe haven
everyday is a paid vacation
In the evening I arrived on a wishbone
so I wished all the stars would go home
but one was a dog with its tail drawn
it wagged (laughed) as it shed, now its long gone
I remember the flavour
but I made a choice to stay here
laying low in a tropical hide-out
if anyone finds out, I'll turn their lights out
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